I cannot believe myself that I will be at law school beginning Fall 07. After many painful rejections, worries why those people don't like me, and anxiety of opening a mail box expecting next rejection are over. I am in the school I want to be and I still cannot believe that I am in. I have a great joy and relief that I don't want to worry any more, at least, until August. However, thought about the whole process comes to me periodically and makes me scared. "And what would be if you didn't get this acceptance?" Of course, I had some backup as two nice schools and I would be happy to attend them. Just that we would spend some money for moving and adjusting to a new place (:-)) like it would be something new to me! after several changes in residence). But although having that happiness my ambition was not satisfied with the way things went. I applied to several schools of the first tier with a hope to get many acceptances because of my background. But it was a great shock when rejections one by one came into my mailbox from school I considered safe.

"What is wrong with me or those guys?" I asked myself many times with disguist to both. I was afraid of many things that possibly were wrong in my file, but the worst was I couldn't know what fact of my application prevented admissions committees to make such a RUDE decision as reject me. First I thought it is my transcript that is hard to be translated into American grade system. However, some schools sent to me rejection, although I submitted evaluation to them. Then I decided that the problem is with my personal statement and looks like I was right. I went to my tutor with it and asked her to tell me truth about what she thinks. She said it was great; however, I didn't sell myself in it. Possibly because of this it didn't work on the people who read it, actually not read by skipped through too many of essays they have to read during a day.

SELL MYSELF to employer, dean of admissions, co-worker, and maybe even to a friend. I think, a couple of years ago I wouldn't agree with it, because I would say I am as I am and if people don't see that it should be theie own problem. However, now, I understand how many things work. The problem is how to learn to sell myself. What should I have written in that personal statement? How great I am? That I am smart and intelligent? Maybe it was just a cultural that I cannot do that - write about myself with a high opinion, my opinion, not others?

I am happy with the decision I have and there is no doubt for me that I will go to that school. But inner voice said that I had a lot of time to prepare for this process and I didn't do enough to compete with others. Although I reached a goal I had, I still not satisfied with the way I acted and did all that. What would I do if I had another chance to do all over?

1. I would spend at least a year for the prparation to LSAT, not as I did preparing only 2 months.
2. I would not be in hurry with submission of applications. First, I would spend more time on my personal statement. Of course, it was difficult to me, because I never have done it in my life. Moreover, my wonderful tutor decided to take time off and I didn't have any person to talk about what I write and how well I write. So instead of "selling myself" I did tell a story about my life.

I think those are the points I would do differently. I understand that it is too late to cry out about my own mistakes and to be worried about my unaccomplishments in admission process, but I am really happy that my admission story has a happy end. Imagine, I even called to admission asking them whether it is not a mistake that I was accepted. That feeling of a satisfaction of the acceptance is a great thing after all survived rejections. Yes, the ambition was hurt, but what should be important for me? Process or result? Yes, the process was delightful even with all its anxiety, but I happy with the result and I don't want my mind to go back with any doubts in my own abilities. What I should take from all that is the lesson of "selling myself" and "writing better". Not sure about working harder, because I think my work was really hard those months of law schools preparations.

Thanks to God. I AM IN!!!!!!!!